Choosing the Right Therapy for You: Why It Matters More Than You Think

hypnowithdean
Jul 16
6 min read

The Bravest Step You’ll Ever Take

Taking the first step towards therapy can feel both hopeful and daunting. Perhaps you have been carrying the weight of anxiety, sadness, or self-doubt for years. Or maybe you are simply curious and wondering if talking to someone could help you untangle your thoughts and find clarity.

Whatever brings you here, you are not alone.

But here is something many people do not realise. Choosing to start therapy is only part of the journey. Choosing the right therapy and the right therapist can make all the difference.

This is not about good or bad therapies. It is about finding what fits you best.

Some people want to understand their past and how it shaped them. Others are looking for practical tools to cope better today and build a calmer future. Some need both.

This guide will help you explore why your choice of therapy matters deeply, how solution-focused and problem-focused therapies differ, what seven popular therapy types offer, the neuroscience behind approaches like hypnotherapy, real-life stories of people finding the right fit, and practical steps to help you make your choice with confidence.

Most importantly, it will remind you that healing is possible and you deserve it.

Therapy Is a Journey Not a Destination

Therapy is not just about fixing a problem. It is about rediscovering who you are beneath the noise, stress, and pain of life. Like any journey, it helps to have a map and the right guide by your side.

The therapeutic process can look very different depending on the approach you choose. Some styles are more reflective and exploratory, inviting you to dive into your history. Others are practical and future-focused, helping you take small steps towards change right away.

Why the Type of Therapy Matters

Imagine Emily. She is 32, a busy professional, and for the past few months she has been struggling with overwhelming anxiety.

She first tried a therapy recommended by a friend, one that involved exploring her childhood in depth. After a few sessions, Emily felt like she was opening old wounds without knowing how to close them. It left her feeling drained, even more anxious, and reluctant to keep going.

It was not that the therapy was wrong. It just was not right for her at that moment.

Six months later Emily tried again. This time she chose a solution-focused hypnotherapy approach. Her therapist helped her build confidence and calm by focusing on what she wanted life to feel like without needing to retell painful stories. She left each session feeling lighter, clearer, and empowered to take small steps forward.

Same Emily. Different therapy. Different outcome.

This is why the right fit matters.

Matt, aged 28, came to therapy after a difficult breakup left him feeling lost and anxious. He initially tried counselling, which gave him a safe place to talk through her feelings. Over several weeks, he gained clarity about patterns in his relationships and learned to set healthier boundaries.

Later, Matt explored breathwork sessions. These helped him release the emotional tension he had been holding in his body for years. He described the experience as “finding a calm I didn’t know I was capable of.”

Matt’s journey reminds us that healing does not always come from one approach. Sometimes, a combination of therapies provides exactly what is needed at different stages of life.

Lisa was 41 when she finally found a therapy that felt right. She had been through three different approaches over a decade, each offering something helpful but never quite giving her the breakthrough she hoped for.

In her twenties, she started with counselling after the sudden loss of her father. Talking helped her process the initial grief and gave her a safe space to feel heard. But as the years passed, she realised her anxiety was still affecting her relationships and work.

She then tried a more problem-focused therapy, exploring her childhood and family dynamics. This gave her valuable insight, but she found it emotionally exhausting and often left sessions feeling heavier rather than lighter.

It was not until her mid-thirties that Lisa discovered solution-focused hypnotherapy. She was initially sceptical, wondering how it could help with problems that felt so deeply rooted. But within a few sessions, she noticed subtle shifts in her thinking.

Instead of focusing on what had gone wrong in her past, her sessions helped her create a vision of what she wanted her future to feel like. She started sleeping better, felt calmer at work, and began to enjoy socialising again without the constant undercurrent of worry.

Lisa reflects now that each therapy played an important role. Counselling helped her survive her grief. Problem-focused work gave her understanding. But solution-focused hypnotherapy helped her finally move forward.

“I wish I had known earlier that it was ok to try different approaches,” Lisa says. “Therapy isn’t about sticking with something that doesn’t feel right. It’s about finding what fits you now.”

The Importance of the Therapist Client Relationship

Alongside the method, the person guiding you is just as important. Research shows the quality of your relationship with your therapist, known as the therapeutic alliance, is one of the strongest predictors of success.

Think of your therapist as a guide. You would not want to climb a mountain with someone you do not trust. The same goes for therapy. You need someone who makes you feel safe and heard, respects your pace and boundaries, and believes in your capacity to heal even on the days you do not.

As someone who works in hypnotherapy I know I am biased about its benefits. But I also care deeply about people finding the right support for them, whatever form that takes. Therapy is such a personal journey and the most important thing is that you feel seen, safe, and supported along the way.

Solution-Focused and Problem-Focused Therapies: Two Paths to Healing

Solution-focused therapies help you define what you want your future to look like and build on your strengths and resources to get there. They tend to stay in the present and future rather than dwelling on the past.

Problem-focused therapies involve exploring and understanding the roots of your struggles, often looking at past experiences and how they continue to affect you today. These approaches can offer deep insight and healing but may also take longer.

Neither approach is better. It depends on your needs, your readiness, and the type of support you feel drawn to.

Exploring Other Therapeutic Approaches

When exploring therapy options, you may find yourself drawn to different approaches at different times in your life.

Counselling provides a safe, supportive environment to process feelings and experiences at your own pace. It can be especially comforting during grief, relationship struggles, or big transitions.

Cognitive Behavioural Therapy, or CBT, offers a practical way to break cycles of negative thinking and behaviour. It helps people reframe unhelpful thought patterns and develop healthier coping strategies, often with exercises to practise between sessions.

Breathwork brings healing through the body. By focusing on slow, intentional breathing, it calms the nervous system and releases emotional tension, creating a sense of inner peace.

Art therapy allows people to express emotions that feel too big or complex for words. Creative activities like painting or sculpting can help access and release feelings stored deep within.

EMDR works in a unique way, using eye movements or tapping while you recall parts of difficult memories. This helps your brain process and release the emotional charge of traumatic experiences without having to relive them in detail.

Each therapy has its own strengths. The right one for you depends on what feels safest and most supportive at this point in your journey.

The Neuroscience of Hypnotherapy

Hypnosis works by calming the nervous system, helping the brain enter a relaxed, focused state where positive suggestions can take root. Over time, this supports the brain’s natural ability to form new pathways, turning healthier thoughts and behaviours into second nature.

Choosing the Right Therapy for You

Ask yourself:

Do I want to explore my past or focus on my future?
Am I looking for insight, tools, or both?
Do I feel ready to talk, or would I prefer a body-based or subconscious approach?

And most importantly, do I feel comfortable with the therapist I am considering?

A Final Thought

The first step in any healing journey is recognising that you deserve support. The second is finding a therapy and a therapist that feel right for you.

If you are exploring your options and would like a calm, no-pressure space to talk, I offer free consultations at Hypnotherapy with Dean to help you decide what feels right for you.

Share Your Thoughts

Have you tried therapy before? Did you find the right fit straight away or was it a journey of exploring different approaches? Share your experiences in the comments below – your story might inspire someone else who is taking their first step.